Attitude Adjustment

I sometimes struggle with honoring my boundaries yet not limiting myself from my full potential. Duh, right. Having experienced my first triathlon my eyes were open to the potential this body I was given has.  It has shifted my thinking (attitude).  I decided to have a yoga marathon of sorts (but not in the way you might think).  I came home from teaching with an hour to spare.  I grabbed the dog, kid (only the oldest as the little one was honoring her boundaries by not coming), husband and even mother and went for a family run around the neighborhood. Amazing to get outside and play as a family. The girls had piano and then they were headed to tailgate while I taught.  I thought in the time I have left before I teach I can stay home and clean or I can yoga.  Hello, no brainer (if I am being honest it is not a no brainer for me typically as I rarely play before all my work is done and lets face it when you have 2 kiddos, a dog and a husband + house guest the work is never done!)  I have been feeling tired and really sleepy so I honored my boundaries and headed to a restorative yoga class.  It was so amazing it rejuvenated me - so I left my mat on the floor and hit a level 2 class right after (I was teaching after level 2 so really it made more since to stay :). In the past I would have stayed home to clean then possibly headed to the level 2 class before teaching assuming I didn't get carried away in my perfectionism and continue to clean right up until I taught.  There is something exciting about exploring my full potential even when that potential is honoring my boundaries by taking care of myself with a restorative yoga class.  My attitude has shifted me into action...

In Christina Sell's book My Body is a Temple, she says " Practice can become a set of attitudes and actions - of efforts that we bring to grace - that align us with the remembrance that who we most truly are, as part of the flow of the Highest, is dignified, noble and essentially good."

How does your attitude for and during your practice align your actions to your true nature?

Nourishment is simply a breath away...

I was honored when my friend / student Jen asked me to be a guest and share with her blog community my thoughts on nourishment.  I am sharing them with you too.  Thank you for the invitation Jen, and for all of your amazing words laced with encouragement each week. They have been inspiring and enlightening!  

I found myself excited by all the ways nourishment presents itself.  So off to the dictionary, I’m using the dictionary from my computer, in the attempt to reel in my enthusiasm. The dictionary helpfully systematizes my understanding of nourishment with these words “the substances necessary for growth, health and good condition” I must add love.

For me, nourishment encompasses being purposeful in all facets of your life. It can be simply showing up for yourself and others fully present with the courage to lead with your heart and the intent to be kind, compassionate, and loving…(I could go on forever here). Nourishment has many faces and often changes with the seasons.

In my life, nourishment begins with reverence, gratitude and grace whether it is in the form of prayer, meditation, journaling, blogging, speaking, practicing, (physical activity – yoga, running etc.) or simply being.  It is followed by what I put in my mouth and what comes out of it. It knocks on the door in the form of breathing (not the in and out repetitive non-conscious breathing, the kind that fills you with sustenance…more on this) food(the kind that is produced from the earth) and dialogue (inner and outer stemming from loving kindness).   It materializes in my lifestyle choices. Being mindful of what goes in and out of my mouth is not easy.  Sometimes convenience presents itself and I want to give in by choosing foods that are not nourishing but fast.  It’s easier to drive through, just throw any ole thing into the cart without understanding what is in it or where it came from or by letting the kids buy prepackaged food that is sold everywhere. It can be tiring contending with society and good marketing vying for the girl’s attention to make healthy choices.  Then it hits me; isn’t it worth the fight to provide and seek knowledge so my family can continue to make healthy nourishing choices throughout life? Giving our bodies the best possible growth avenue? Will what we are about to consume provide my family with the nutrients needed to live a healthy active life?  Is it made with love? The same goes for what comes out of my mouth. It is mostly in the way I talk to myself but can sometimes extend to what I say to others. Can I nourish others with my words? Can I nourish myself with my thoughts?

Nourishment can surprise me by making a guest appearance in the form of letting go or the act of surrendering what no longer serves my mind or body. I sometimes find it while taking the first sip of coffee (not saying coffee is nourishing I’m aware of its faults) in a quiet house with only a glimmer of light and the auspiciousness of a new day. It kicks me out of bed on a cold morning with the promise of nourishing my family and to sip said coffee.  It envelops me in the form of my husband’s loving arms around me. It lures me awake in the middle of the night in the form of my child snuggling so close her nose touches mine all the while knowing I will not get an ounce of sleep but will feel nourished with the notion that I provided love and security for her. It’s ever presence in my children’s words, laughter and actions.  I am most comforted in knowing that when I feel depleted there is so much nourishment that surrounds me. Below is a practice in nourishment.

Nourishment practice:

You can do this anywhere (a car, a chair, in your bed, on a cushion, at the grocery store). Begin bringing awareness to your breath (just as an observer – leaving judgment at the back door). Inhale more deeply let it fill your entire mid section extending to your spine, side body all the way to your lower belly. Exhale (slowly) all of your air out through your nose. Continue to breathe deep adding nourishment every time you inhale. Let it be expansive. Exhale what no longer serves you (negative self talk, anything that resides in the form of toxicity). You can do it 3 times or 300.  It’s always accessible no matter where you are.   Nourishment is a breath away. 

"the practice"

I participated in my first triathlon this past weekend (sorta the reason I am late to post - still playing catch up after being gone all weekend).  I would like to thank all of the people in my life who sent me well wishes and encouragement.  Without your endless support and love I would not have even tried to complete something like this. You are my wings!

My knowledge cup has most certainly been filled this weekend. I have learned first that the body is capable of so much when properly tended to. The second is I am more committed to my yoga practice having gone through this.  It really highlighted the amazingness that is “the practice”.  The dedication, gratitude, balance, reverence and these are just a few of the many things yoga gifts me.  As I was on the bike getting passed by women who were significantly older than I (insert cough 30+ years older) I was pondering how empowering it felt to be a part of this event amongst all of these incredible athletes.  I was present – fully present enjoying the moment and the hard work I had put into this as my body did what it was trained to do. 

In the first event, the swim, I witnessed fear grip me and then something took over.  I put my head in the water and faced fear head on cultivating courage, presence and dedication.  In Anusara yoga (the type of yoga I practice) the A’s represent Attitude, Alignment and Action.  In this instance, my attitude was recalibrated, my alignment kicked in as I began the rhythmic breathing and the full extension of my arms followed by action as I started pulling ahead of the pack (I must admit my ego was super impressed by this!).  Thank you Anusara Yoga.  All in all as I watched others cross the finish line (of particular interest, a man who had to be pushing 80 years old) I was grateful to be apart of this event.  I was grateful for the body that brought me through it. I was grateful for the friend who encouraged me to try and then proceeded to encourage some more while we trained. I was grateful for the yoga that has taught me sooooo much and continues to be a source of light and, let’s face it, a life raft. So much gratitude poured into me. It was to say the least, empowering and 100% awesome! What ever your training for or dedicating yourself to, the attitude, alignment and action / hard work is worth it!  I have learned that the body can sometimes feel like a flimsy branch, the mind is like a bird on that branch sometimes fearful of the branch breaking, but “the practice” can remind us to sing all the while knowing we have wings. 

Inner Landscaping - Outer Curb Appeal

What is it about fall and cooler weather (ok so not this week but you know what I mean) that inspires.  All of a sudden I find myself wanting to paint my walls, change my house or merely seeking something to let my creative juices flow.  This need for change, cleaning out, or just simply pruning away can be dangerous as I'm struck with an impulse to get rid of everything and work with a blank canvas (so not part of my eco-friendly lifestyle).  I have painted a couple of walls and nothing is turning out how I envisioned. As a matter fact, I am indecisive about where to go next. I read once your inner landscape is how you view your outer world. Introspectively, what inside is painting my outer world? What is sprouting the need for clearing or even the indecisiveness? Is it just simply so new inspiration can flourish? I think I will take this creativity to the mat and just allow myself to play and explore.  Maybe some flying pigeon or some good old fashion flowing without a game plan.  Meditating and going inward quietly awaiting the message.

How does your inner landscape paint your outer world?

Lemons, Cards & Water - oH mY

When life gives you lemons you make lemonade.  You play the cards your dealt? That's what they say...right?  When ever life gives me "lemons" I start to recall what I have been asking (praying, cultivating etc) for.  Well I'm stumped.  We have had 2 or so inches of water covering our bathroom and closet, a spilled product all over the laundry room, and now the car is leaking water out of the dashboard.  Totaling a lot of warped wood, wet carpet and devoted time to operation clean it all up.  Sigh... I have prayed for water to aid in this drought, I have been trying to cultivate balance, and I always ask for patience.  I have also been looking at those baseboards wanting them to look newer or at least painted.  I hear you up there - message received.  I'm working on it but boy do I feel a new found irritation for water in this regard and would appreciate water from the perspective of rain that would help fill the lake and quench the thirst of our Texas soil.  I realize this is somewhat specific and selfish and ultimately it's not something I can control. I must surrender to a higher power all the while learning from the cards I am dealt (oh and I don't always have to be happy about that hand sometimes you have to throw out all the cards and start from scratch even if you loose a turn). I don't really play cards so I may be reaching here.

This week I am embracing my limitations (inflexibility) on the mat so that I can feel ultimate freedom (thank you Mandy for the reminder). I am also focusing on action and balance AHA balanced action.  I smell arm balances and inversions possibly coupled with some drop back work (might as well continue to utilize this heat and the practice of chiseling away fear).  My mat needs to see my commitment to playing (attitude), balanced action and ultimately freedom.  From my heart to yours...

why hello light...what have you done to the dark

Randomness:
Sometimes (ok all the time) I have ideas pop into my head of things I would like to write about or an update I'd like to post to facebook.  For those of you who don't know, I have an aversion to facebook.  Why I have no idea.  I mean I LOVE reading what other's post as it gives me a sense of connection.  For instance, I can still be apart of there lives even though they live so very far away and have drifted apart. It also allows me to keep up to date on my favorite yoga teacher's and what they have going on. Some of my favorite updates are the nuggets of wisdom sewn in that make my day brighter. For all of you facebookers and you know who you are - thank you!  Yet I still find myself hesitating or not posting.  Anyway this is so not about my facebook crazies! I do think I should seek help on this matter.  Whatcha got for me?

I was thinking yesterday about how much light I have in my life.  How much joy and utter gratitude there is in this life.  I am fully cognizant that pain and suffering exist and darkness can inspire.  My husband and I were deciding on what documentary we were going to watch when I finally said "please no darkness not today I need love and inspiration!" So we watched a documentary on marathoners.  *Check* I am inspired and grateful for this amazing body that allows me to do so much. It may not agree to anything over 4 miles on the track but it's 4 miles!!!  We have so much to give and live so I thought about these buckets of gratitude and intention.  These ways we tether ourselves to the light...

Ways I see the light (aka gratitude and grace):
1. My child hugging our dog sweetly when no one sees
2. The same child crawling through the doggie door with a smile as big as the sea
3. My oldest figuring out something on her own then the glee in her eye at her own accomplishment of something she thought not available to her
4. My husband's hands on my shoulders. They feel strong and loving as he bends down to kiss my head
5. A cul-de-sac filled with kids doing what they do best - playing coupled with parents gathered around talking - a true since of community

When darkness falls:
1. Holding space for whatever that is
2. Not shutting off the pain all the while knowing the only thing that is permanent is impermanence
3. Knowing you can talk to people you love and feeling secure in doing so even if it doesn't change the circumstance
4. Security knowing there is a higher power at work (no matter what your religious beliefs) - cultivating love and non attachment
5. Giving yourself permission to stay in your pj's curled up in the fetal position with the lights out maybe after just throwing a temper tantrum tissues near by as the flood begins (what don't judge) :).

Days / Weeks Intentions:
1. Smooch my children and hold on a little longer
2. Acknowledge my husband and all he does and gives
3. Yoga, Yoga, Yoga both physical, mental and emotional - this includes self care
4.  Stillness, reflection, and time to open my heart and receive love from God
5. Write a blog post :)

Things that make you obnoxiously laugh out loud full volume:
1. A young child wearing bigger than adult size sun glasses with the glass part taken out (picture nerd but so much cuter)
2. Friend's musings about life
3. My students feeling comfortable enough to tell me we are on the wrong foot again and then mocking the way I say something
4. Dry humor tv or books
5. Inappropriate things like people falling (not getting hurt of course) I think that's more a nervous laugh

Thing's that make me cry:
1. Inspiring stories or intense times of gratitude
2. Heart felt books, movies or real stories about people, animals etc.
3. My child or love one performing
4. Honestly I am not a cryer so I will have to fill in more later

Fill in your blanks or share some of the buckets with us if your so inclined. How do you tether yourself to the light?  I truly love hearing from you...thank you for stopping by :).

Where'd It go?

My dear friend Heather has so graciously agreed to write a guest post for us.  She just moved here from New Orleans and the Austin Yoga Community could not be luckier.  She has been teaching yoga in New Orleans and I hope each of you has the pleasure of flowing with her sometime.  With endless gratitude...

It seems as if we've all found ourselves too busy to practice asana (poses) at one time or another.  My first lapse was after Hurricane Katrina.  Prior to the storm, I would spend the cooler morning hours on my balcony, practicing as the birds flew past and the nearby Mississippi River port creaked her early morning complaints.  When my husband, dogs and I evacuated, I took enough yoga clothes for a few days, my mat, and a book on butterfly gardening.  My husband packed a few clothes, his video camera and laptop, while the dogs brought their beds, leashes, treats, and blankets.  It still amazes me that in the face of losing so much, we took so little.  I had no idea how long my practice would be set aside or how much it would mean to find it unscathed beneath the rubble.

A couple of years later, we began rebuilding our home.  Life in a construction zone propelled me toward a neighborhood yoga studio.  The return to asana was akin to reuniting with an old friend.  Like any good friend, she harbored no ill feelings toward my absence.  She understood completely... other aspects of life demanded my full attention.  She made it clear that she would be there no matter what and that she would never hold my choices or circumstances against me.

Most recently, my husband, dogs, cat and I sold our home in New Orleans and moved to Austin.  Months were spent on ladders, painting every inch of our old home to prep it for sale.  Hours slipped by working in the garden. Carpenters helped finish longstanding projects.  We received an offer the first day the home was listed.  Packing ensued.  We hired movers, looked for a place to live and made plans to settle into a new environment.

Again, the swift change of current allowed the practice to escape me.  Had I placed it in a box and taped it closed without labeling it?  Would I ever find it again? Did the movers accidentally ship it to the wrong address? Would I even be able to touch my toes by the time I got it back?  I was met with anxiety, which worsened day by day.  Guilt set in, then resentment because I felt guilty about not practicing, followed by inertia, despair, crankiness... (you get the point) when finally, it occurred to me that asana had provided the strength and focus to prepare the home, to precariously balance on twelve foot ladders, paint ceilings, lift furniture, and gain the courage (albeit shaky) to step into the unknown.  I'd been practicing the entire time.

I arrived in Austin untethered and slightly wild-eyed, but life returned to a pace that allowed me to swim to shore and engage in daily physical practice.  I soon found myself drawn to grounding restorative classes and slow-moving vinyasa, my roots spread a bit deeper despite the foreign soil, and, just as promised, my old friend was there to greet me with open arms.