Choosing how to fill your plate...

The giving of thanks is upon us and I couldn't be more thrilled. I have noticed the more gratitude is cultivated the brighter and more abundant life seems to be.  In my yoga classes I have been talking a lot about presence.  How in the face of life, family, or even our own darkness presence is a trusty tool that can get us through.  Not saying that you need to "get through" family, life or darkness just sayin it can wake you up.  If you find yourself reverting back to old roles or habits cultivating presence can be a life raft.  A little taste of random: We went with one of our favorite families to see Happy Feet 2.  I am not much of a cartoon watcher but fell in love with the message in this movie.  So many nuggets.  One in particular said something to the effect Problems are merely Opportunities. I saw a post from Elena Brower (paraphrasing here) Do you choose lack and fear or abundance and opportunities.  Ummmm...I'll take abundance and opportunity please with a side of love!

Today I...
stared into beautiful blue eyes filled with love and happiness so powerful it penetrated my soul
hugged and kissed a little girl drinking in the sweetness of the moment
tasted...really tasted what went in my mouth
Watched the freedom that came from my little girl simply laying on my lap reaching into a backbend with pure delight
Tuned in to the laughter finding the musical quality and joy
Felt a familiar kiss with new wonderment just by living in the moment
Noticed my breath being shallow and deepening said breath to fill myself with needed nourishment
Listened to a song that brought about such a strong feeling within without the distraction of my thoughts
Moved my body with love and full attention
Paused to stare out the window getting lost in the movement of the trees
Stretched really really stretched forgetting how truly yummy it can feel without attachment
Sat in stillness reveling in abundance and opportunity...and LOVE
Truly ENDLESS graTITUDE...Have you ordered abundance and opportunity with a side of love.  If not, I highly recommend it.  Side effects include but are not limited to: happiness, shifted consciousness, sillyNess, compassion, joy, laughter, obsessive smiling, cheesE behavior, hugging, dancing, worthiness, willingness to try new things and LOVE...................

Fire RED raWness

"We like to keep things separate, so we don't see the compost that helps make the garden, the mud that helps grow the lotus, or the dirt, sweat and blood that helps create a diamond. It's not pure but we think its pure." Thich Nhat Hanh

I was reading The Daily Love on Sunday when I wrote my last post.  It reminded me of something I read from Judith Hanson Lasator and again from Rolf Gates...We hate or resent in others the unresolved parts of ourselves.  When you find that you are angry with someone - its a great time to be introspective about what may be lurking within you.  Its seems I may have misplaced this message when it made a comeback on Sunday.   In the interest of being RAW and authentic (which if you go back and read some of my posts it's apparent I am searching for authenticity among other traits ahemmm patience lol) I just started typing what I felt at that exact moment.  No censoring just raw words.  It took a lot courage to hit the send button but it was something I needed to put out there even if no one read it or lots of people read it.  I will tell you the anger I was feeling has another color, depth and meaning.  I am letting it be my teacher / guide (thank you yoga!!!!!). It can be comforting thinking of anger in this way.  Insert Ahhhhh moment - I ask to soften, be gentle, live from my heart and there it is RAW.  The quote above sums it up nicely for me.  Thank you Emily for sharing it in your newsletter!  I also like to give a shout out to the Beatles " all we need is love"! Which leads me to this quote... "we are not held back by the love we didn't receive in the past, but by the love we are not extending in the present." ~ Marianne Williamson

I am extending my RAW self and love to you. I would love to hear your thoughts.  May anger (or whatever emotion it is for you) be your teacher / guide ;).  M

A Rambling Heart

Tears flood my cheeks
Not usual in this body
not usual for this strong yet weak lost soul
hiding is easier
pretending is easier
yet it comes back in unexpected waves
a slap while reading the truth
fierce emotion wells up but no worries the wall is always near
lost
oh so deeply lost
face the truth head on
but then more tears
why now
why are after all of these years of not crying
why now
Is it my new found quest to become a truth seeker
the consciousness I pray for
the living from my heart
more tears
can I let it go?????????

Self I do CARE

How often do you know what you need but you ignore it.  Too much to do....
Today a good friend of mine made mention of places that get much colder (snowed in without being able to leave the house colder).  She said it forces you to stop the busyness.  Does it though?  I think I could find millions of things to do inside of my house if I was shut in.  Which leads me to *it is up to ME to take ME time*

Today I came home with tunnel vision.  I walked into the house and went straight to the bathroom.  I drew a bath with all sorts of yummy sea salts and rose oil.  I shed the guilt and my clothes and hopped into the warmth.  I closed my eyes and embodied the sweetness. My mind for once was blank, still and my body melted.  I thought of nothing really nothing at all.  Can it be that easy? Is this what balance would feel like?

Maybe the rain has brought with it auspiciousness.  A since of hope laced with a the promise of taking care of the earth. Self, I know I have been hard on you. I know I have ignored you for too long.  Thank you for always enduring - I WILL do better.

How do you care for yourself?  What does it take for the care to happen?  I would love to hear how you lOvE you!

Grace Takes Up Residency

May my practice be an embodied offer of beauty.  For grace resides within me.  Intrinsic goodness is my true nature.  I do not have to look externally for it - it is always apart of who I am.  My practice does not have to be a place of judgement but a blank canvas ready for me to paint. Asana (practice) dedicated from the heart illustrating effort that stems from loving kindness.  Let my practice encompass playfulness, laughter and dedication rooted in trusting in the foundation I have set for myself.  Let my practice begin with opening to grace.  This does not mean "life" won't rear it's ugly head.  It is then my purpose to receive "life" with an open heart imploring its beauty because I have embodied it.

Why do you practice yoga or anything?  What brings you to the mat?  How do you open to grace?

Attitude Adjustment

I sometimes struggle with honoring my boundaries yet not limiting myself from my full potential. Duh, right. Having experienced my first triathlon my eyes were open to the potential this body I was given has.  It has shifted my thinking (attitude).  I decided to have a yoga marathon of sorts (but not in the way you might think).  I came home from teaching with an hour to spare.  I grabbed the dog, kid (only the oldest as the little one was honoring her boundaries by not coming), husband and even mother and went for a family run around the neighborhood. Amazing to get outside and play as a family. The girls had piano and then they were headed to tailgate while I taught.  I thought in the time I have left before I teach I can stay home and clean or I can yoga.  Hello, no brainer (if I am being honest it is not a no brainer for me typically as I rarely play before all my work is done and lets face it when you have 2 kiddos, a dog and a husband + house guest the work is never done!)  I have been feeling tired and really sleepy so I honored my boundaries and headed to a restorative yoga class.  It was so amazing it rejuvenated me - so I left my mat on the floor and hit a level 2 class right after (I was teaching after level 2 so really it made more since to stay :). In the past I would have stayed home to clean then possibly headed to the level 2 class before teaching assuming I didn't get carried away in my perfectionism and continue to clean right up until I taught.  There is something exciting about exploring my full potential even when that potential is honoring my boundaries by taking care of myself with a restorative yoga class.  My attitude has shifted me into action...

In Christina Sell's book My Body is a Temple, she says " Practice can become a set of attitudes and actions - of efforts that we bring to grace - that align us with the remembrance that who we most truly are, as part of the flow of the Highest, is dignified, noble and essentially good."

How does your attitude for and during your practice align your actions to your true nature?

Nourishment is simply a breath away...

I was honored when my friend / student Jen asked me to be a guest and share with her blog community my thoughts on nourishment.  I am sharing them with you too.  Thank you for the invitation Jen, and for all of your amazing words laced with encouragement each week. They have been inspiring and enlightening!  

I found myself excited by all the ways nourishment presents itself.  So off to the dictionary, I’m using the dictionary from my computer, in the attempt to reel in my enthusiasm. The dictionary helpfully systematizes my understanding of nourishment with these words “the substances necessary for growth, health and good condition” I must add love.

For me, nourishment encompasses being purposeful in all facets of your life. It can be simply showing up for yourself and others fully present with the courage to lead with your heart and the intent to be kind, compassionate, and loving…(I could go on forever here). Nourishment has many faces and often changes with the seasons.

In my life, nourishment begins with reverence, gratitude and grace whether it is in the form of prayer, meditation, journaling, blogging, speaking, practicing, (physical activity – yoga, running etc.) or simply being.  It is followed by what I put in my mouth and what comes out of it. It knocks on the door in the form of breathing (not the in and out repetitive non-conscious breathing, the kind that fills you with sustenance…more on this) food(the kind that is produced from the earth) and dialogue (inner and outer stemming from loving kindness).   It materializes in my lifestyle choices. Being mindful of what goes in and out of my mouth is not easy.  Sometimes convenience presents itself and I want to give in by choosing foods that are not nourishing but fast.  It’s easier to drive through, just throw any ole thing into the cart without understanding what is in it or where it came from or by letting the kids buy prepackaged food that is sold everywhere. It can be tiring contending with society and good marketing vying for the girl’s attention to make healthy choices.  Then it hits me; isn’t it worth the fight to provide and seek knowledge so my family can continue to make healthy nourishing choices throughout life? Giving our bodies the best possible growth avenue? Will what we are about to consume provide my family with the nutrients needed to live a healthy active life?  Is it made with love? The same goes for what comes out of my mouth. It is mostly in the way I talk to myself but can sometimes extend to what I say to others. Can I nourish others with my words? Can I nourish myself with my thoughts?

Nourishment can surprise me by making a guest appearance in the form of letting go or the act of surrendering what no longer serves my mind or body. I sometimes find it while taking the first sip of coffee (not saying coffee is nourishing I’m aware of its faults) in a quiet house with only a glimmer of light and the auspiciousness of a new day. It kicks me out of bed on a cold morning with the promise of nourishing my family and to sip said coffee.  It envelops me in the form of my husband’s loving arms around me. It lures me awake in the middle of the night in the form of my child snuggling so close her nose touches mine all the while knowing I will not get an ounce of sleep but will feel nourished with the notion that I provided love and security for her. It’s ever presence in my children’s words, laughter and actions.  I am most comforted in knowing that when I feel depleted there is so much nourishment that surrounds me. Below is a practice in nourishment.

Nourishment practice:

You can do this anywhere (a car, a chair, in your bed, on a cushion, at the grocery store). Begin bringing awareness to your breath (just as an observer – leaving judgment at the back door). Inhale more deeply let it fill your entire mid section extending to your spine, side body all the way to your lower belly. Exhale (slowly) all of your air out through your nose. Continue to breathe deep adding nourishment every time you inhale. Let it be expansive. Exhale what no longer serves you (negative self talk, anything that resides in the form of toxicity). You can do it 3 times or 300.  It’s always accessible no matter where you are.   Nourishment is a breath away.