When Indifference Moves You to Action

Yoga Sutra I.14A 
You must cultivate your practice over an extended period of time.

There are days cultivating my practice comes easy.  Like waking up with the warm cozy feeling of a goodnight sleep.  There are also days were this is hard like waking up feeling like you tossed and turned all night an surely the alarm DID not just sound.  I feel like even more difficult than either of those is the days of indifference.  The days where you wake up not feeling tired or rested.  The days where your head is buzzing with thoughts but nothing gets resolved.  The days where you chase your tail knowing you were VERY busy all day but what got done?

These are the days that the practice is the most important. Showing up for yourself and the mat and cultivating compassion and kindness.  Loving the familiarity of poses in a sequence even if you have done them a million times or a few.  Sun salutations for me are a familiar dance that help spark the heart and move past the indifference.  Maybe I will only go through Surya Namasakar A five or so times - not thinking about the breath just moving. I find that my breath knows what to do and so I deepen it.  Often times it leads me to other poses that I didn't think about just instinctually went to.  All it takes is stepping onto the mat.  Each and every time I step onto the mat it is a building block.  It's a way to still the mind and move the body. 


I must cultivate my practice over and extended period of time with patience, love and action.  I must not ask if I will practice but when. Just as I would not ask myself if I was going to eat.  I may have to decide when or what to eat but eating is a given - as is living yoga, cultivating my practice and well breathing...duh!  Enjoy the journey of cultivating your practice and please leave a comment on how you accomplish this or what gets you to the mat when indifference or lack of drive knocks :).  All love!

The DaRk Side

Do you get frustrated when your dark being escapes? Do everything you can to put it neatly back in a container on your mental shelf?  Maybe your a closet snob.  Maybe you have a temper that could burn a city.  Maybe you let people step on you.  Maybe you play the role of the victim too often? What if we looked at it from the perspective of...whatever you feel like hiding is probably what inspires the brightest light. What if we looked at the dark side as a teacher, guider, love instigator?  Would it change how you handle the darkness?  Is it possible to examine our "faults" (for lack of a better word) the same as as we triumph a job well done. What if we looked at our internal dark beings as a growth opportunity, a celebration of who we are and the understanding that it is all part of our path / journey.  I sometimes loose it with my children instead of coming from a place of curiosity, I snap at my husband, I am not always patient, I can be a snob, judgmental, and even rude to the people I love most.  I want to be able to embrace the dark side as a gauge of how far I have come.  To honor that I am able to be present enough to see that it is dark and to understand the importance of balance.  I am not saying to idealize all that is bad and to grant yourself permission to behave in ways that are dark or hurtful.  I am however saying that we all have a dark side.  If we use our energy to constantly try and hide or squash it does it then consume us?

My dark being on the mat is the perfectionist, the ego self wanting to have everything look and feel exactly right, the judge who says I can't, the comparer of others that leads to "i suck", and the joyless striver.  My work on the mat will involve the non-judgemental observer, flowing from a state grace, leading with my heart and being aware of attitude in all that I do.  Oh and to tell myself I am a magnificent being both in the dark and in the light.

How will you embrace the dark?

Re-SET

I have to say that I have had a challenging week with technology.  I have tried to post a couple different times this week and have lost everything.  If it is not my internet connection it's my server or my smart phone.  So I unplugged everything.  Literally gave technology a night off.  I re-plugged everything back in and voila!  I think everything is back to working.  I remember reading a blog post by a friend of mine with a similar dialogue.  Her rebooting experience also left her to question her internal booting process. Thankfully (and I mean sooooooo much thanks to my parents) every summer my parents whisk my kiddos away allowing me to reboot.  I always dread them leaving and miss them terribly while they are gone.  With that said, I have really taken and opportunity this week to reboot / re-energize heck even re-enter the Austin scene.  I have taken yoga classes with teachers I never get to practice with, had lunch with a dear friend, went on a date with my husband, enjoyed an afternoon with my sister, and sat on my tookish and read, oh I also only had to clean the house once this week because hello no kids means no mess! I swam laps, slept in and watched movies.

Insert randomness...I don't know about you but IT'S HOT!  I mean stinkin hot.  Yet I find myself feeling like I need to go go go do do do.  What I need is cooling liquid, cooling foods, and cooling rebooting time.  Done done and done!  It has been an amazing week (minus the technology madness but even that contributed).  I feel re-energized and like someone hit the re-set button.

Often times I forget the importance of quiet time, yoga time and overall me time.  I get into a routine and let those things slip by.  I feel so inspired getting to take yoga classes with the teacher I study with and yoga teacher friends and that doesn't even give justice to how my body feels after an hour and 1/2 + of community yoga everyday. Ahhhhhhhhh.

How do you reboot?  How do you escape the heat and slow down? What inspires and awakens you after you reboot?  All love and gratitude!  Please leave a comment - I would love to hear from you :)...

Free

I feel free when...?  When I know the sound of the alarm is not what is going to wake me, when the calendar is a blank canvas, when my girls and I use that blank canvas to paint the day, when my husband and I are drinking coffee with nothing on the agenda, when I am on the mat doing inversions or heart openers, when I am swept away by the words of another, when I am fully present enjoying all that my life is.  I could keep going on and on and on but I really want to know when you feel your free"ist"...

Happy Independence Day!

“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. To keep our faces toward change and behave like free spirits in the presence of fate is strength undefeatable." ~ Helen Keller