I'm committing myself...

Lately when I come into stillness on my mat the word that comes to my head when I am setting my intention is *commitment* (authentic gives a shout out too).  Ah yes, I will commit to a more consistent meditation practice.  I will sit everyday no excuses. (Oh and I will commit to flossing everyday as well!)  Who gave my inner salesperson permission to go on vacation!  I tell myself you can start on Monday.  Why is Monday any different than today?  Why is Monday the magical day that is going to make this endeavor that much more doABLE?  Poor December is dedicated to gluttonous behavior because ultimately we will change said behavior January 1st...well 2nd let's face it, January 1st is like the first pancake - a wash. (It has to be said, I delightfully eat the first pancake.)

I think the idea of commitment was inspired by my neighbor/dear friend/yoga student. She recently was doing her normal committed saturday run when she was bit by a dog.  When I saw her that same day she gave us the story but ended with, "I am not suppose to put pressure on my arm so I will have to modify when I come to yoga on Tuesday." I stopped in my tracks, here she was bit by a dog stitches and all and she was thinking about her yoga class.  Truly inspirational, brave and fully committed.

Is there a commitment you have been wanting to the pull the trigger on and have put it off?  Would you like to state said commitment here to solidify it a bit more?  I would love to hear it and I would love any feedback you have on how to enhance my committed self!

I like this quote...
"There is a difference between interest and commitment. When you are interested in doing something, you do it only when circumstance permits. When you are committed to something, you accept no excuses, only results." ~unknown... I would change the word results to action...tomatoE / tomato.

So there it is I am committing to meditating daily, my yoga practice and flossing!  How bout' you?

Kula/Community & the Dialogue

I have been thinking a lot about community and yoga.  I have been toying with this idea of a community blog / forum that supports and shares beautiful wisdom, insight and experience. For example, one of the main reasons I started to write was because I valued a friend's blog and how people she is connected to comment and support what she writes. I am interested in a dialogue more than a monologue :).  Some of the comments are simply gratitude for the words written that may have inspired their day and some of them are thought provoking comments that either expound on her words or invite a different view on the topic. She once wrote about goal setting and someone commented how they saw goal setting differently which really opened my eyes to two very different opinions on the matter.  It widened my outlook giving me something to chew on.  As it so happens, I thoughtfully shifted my view on goal setting.

I feel so very fortunate (truly) to meet, know and love many magnificent people with brilliant ideas brimming in their minds.  I would love for anyone to feel comfortable commenting on my post so we can explore and play with objectively loving words, thoughts and diversity.  I would love for fellow yogi's to guest post and share.  Ahhhhhhhh...I have thrown it out there now let's see what happens :).

"Community is our native state. You play hardest for a hometown crowd. You become your best self. You know joy. This is not a guess; there is evidence. The scholars who study social well-being can put it on charts and graphs. In the last 30 years our material wealth has increased in this country, but our self-described happiness has steadily declined. Elsewhere, the people who consider themselves very happy are not in the very poorest nations, as you might guess, nor in the very richest. The winners are Mexico, Ireland, Puerto Rico, the kinds of places we identify with extended family, noisy villages, a lot of dancing. The happiest people are the ones with the most community." Barbara Kingsolver on community 

I'm perfect!

I'm Perfect! Even typing the words makes my stomach uneasy, my internal nay sayer activates, and my heart engages.  I am finding inspiration reading "Yoga from the Inside Out" by Christina Sell (my Anusara Immersion teacher).  Since I can remember, I have always been one who strives for perfection in Merriam Webster's version of being without fault or defect. Let me elaborate...when someone used to compliment me on a job well done I would wait.  Wait for what you ask...the criticism, the what you could have done better, the BUT! When I didn't receive the latter I thought they were holding back not giving me the full truth. In the book she talks about how the sleeping world has conditioned us to think we are guilty (not worthy) until proven innocent (our true nature).  She talks about her past and how this plays a role in how she treats herself - all relatable.  Don't get me wrong, I don't think this perfectionistic trait is only destructive it can serve as a growth vehicle when used objectively. However, if I only attach to what is "wrong" and blind to what is "right" then it no longer serves as a growth vehicle.

Can I grow without the BUT?  Can I trust that I am perfect in the "full" "complete" "sure" "satisfied" version of the word? Can I relish in the positive energy and love that is being shared with me?  Can I accept the gift without ad libbing from the internal judge and simply surrender to the way things are?  

This week I will take my perfect self to the mat as a non-judgemental observer.  I will bring awareness to what arises with objectivity and not judgement.  I will practice discernment and trust in order to determine which internal processes serve my yoga practice and which of these patterns hinder my growth and development. I will have complete gratitude for this amazing vehicle (body) I bring to the mat day in and day out. Your perfect just the way you are as it is not a path of perfection but a path of progression :).

Trust thyself: every heart vibrates to that iron string. Accept the place the divine providence has found for you, the society of your contemporaries, the connection of events. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Intention Reverts

Do you ever find yourself in the midst of a comfortable situation with people whom you have long standing relationships (family) and then all of sudden in a blink of an eye you revert to an old behavior or role?  Maybe you were trying to cultivate living authentically and you are presented with the opportunity to fully embody said intention yet you take the familiar even comfortable path in one unconscious moment. Bam you revert just like that - no matter how hard you have been tending to the authenticity seed.  I am *sure* this is all part of the journey and if it were easy then it would most likely not be an intention.  Do we have to take these mis-steps in order to learn? Are there 2 intentions simultaneously teaching.  I guess what I am saying is, if you have the intention to live authentically and the intention to not beat yourself up when you stumble off the path of living authentically is the second intention's work at play?

I'm not willing to let myself off the hook completely.  Yet I am finding not throwing punches or wallowing in it comforting.  I have made the choice to use my energy to guide myself back on the path and onto the mat. Utilizing this stumble to learn all the while feeling the cuts and bruises (empowering wounds) that came with the fall.